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| 3/20/06
"T'is an Orc, it is!!! I'm sure of it! I know an Orc when I see one. Lazy, fat Orc. I guess I didn't realize those things were still around. I think it's having trouble breathing, though. It probably won't be around for long. Good riddance, I say." —Bulbo Burrows of Needlehole (a Hobbit in attendance at the IU/Gonzaga game), pointing out Marco Killingsworth ________________________________________________________________________ 3/21/06 "And YOU can count on ME meeting you in the parking lot after the game. Bitch." —Gonzaga's Adam Morrison to Roderick Wilmont, after Wilmont sarcastically congratulated Morrison on his ability to count ________________________________________________________________________ 3/23/06 "Of course I'm upset. But you know what? Playing for Duke has been a great experience. Oh, the stories I have! Many moons from now, I will bring my tales of wonder and whimsy back to the river people. And we will feast." —Duke's Sheldon Williams following the Blue Devis' loss to LSU (which ended Williams' collegiate career) ________________________________________________________________________ 3/27/06 "You have a special talent, a gift. Not the school's, not the townspeople's, not the team's, not Mike Davis', not mine. It's yours, to do with what you choose. Because that's what I believe, I can tell you this: I don't care if you play on the team or not." —Kelvin Sampson, speaking to Robert Vaden, who was shooting hoops on the dirt court behind Assembly Hall, trying to act distant and unimpressed) ________________________________________________________________________ 4/3/06 "Stand up and take your smiting like men. It begins today, you sad sacks of s---." —God, speaking at the 2006 Opening Day Banquet, put on by the Skokie chapter of "Chicago Cubs Fans Annonymous" ________________________________________________________________________ 4/6/06 "They want to play hardball, do they? Fine. Destroy them. And hang their carcasses from the Butler Cabin. Let us send a message to the rest of 'em. You have 38 seconds. You go now." —Augusta National Chairman Hootie Johnson, after being informed that a family of ducks left droppings on the 17th fairway |
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